Tommy Savitt is the man to go to when you need
relationship advice.
"Hey, Tommy," you ask him. "I want to spend more time
with my husband. What should I do?"
He stops, thinks, then answers:
"Get yourself a job at a topless bar."
That's the wisdom of Savitt. He knows how men think,
or at least certain men. That's why he's painted
himself as a relationship guru, a young Dr. Phil with
attitude and a subscription to Penthouse.
"Hey, Tommy," comes another query.
"Where's the
easiest place to pick up women?"
"Where do you think?" he responds.
"A brothel."
Savitt parcels out his advice on comedy stages around
the country, including Rascals Comedy Club in Phoenix
this weekend. He's one of the most original comedians
around, with his sleepy Brooklyn accent rhythmically
repeating the phrase, "Hey, Tommy." He says it so
often that the words stay in your head for days after
seeing his set.
The humor may sound slightly misogynistic, but Savitt,
28, tempers it by being instantly likable. Punch lines
are delivered with a smile. He hit upon his stage
personality eight years ago.
"I tried, like, 12 different personas until I found
the right one," he says.
"I found the voice that is
actually the closest to who I am, and it's the one
people relate to."
For example, he wonders aloud onstage:
"I just got my
girlfriend pregnant. ... How long should I wait before
I start dating again?"
Thanks to his prickly humor, women occasionally object
to the gags in his set.
"But that's because they're just listening to the
words," he says.
"My act is not mean-spirited. It's
all tongue-in-cheek. Some people don't get irony. But
if they get offended, hey, that's my right to free
speech."
And Savitt knows what he's talking about in that area,
too. He's more than just a not-so-smooth operator.
He's an attorney licensed to practice in New York and
Connecticut.
"No one believes I'm a lawyer, even when I say it
onstage," he says with a sigh.
"They think it's an
act."
But he graduated from Brooklyn Law School with plans
to become a judge advocate general until he got a
taste of Marine boot camp.
"I would make the drill instructors laugh," he says.
"They encouraged me. That's when I realized I had this
power."
He later took a two-week course in stand-up comedy --
don't laugh, he swears by classes -- before turning
professional. He hasn't practiced law in years.
"All I do is comedy. This is my passion. I'm in this
for the long run."
Plus, there are still so many people for him to help,
either through the stage or his Web site, www.heytommy.net.
"Hey, Tommy ... How do I know if my girlfriend really
likes me?" goes a query on his site.
"Quit your job," he responds.
